One of the reasons why I don´t take the ´Love is Everything, We are all One, it´s Spirit´s Will´ argument as a default is because it´s so open to abuse. And it´s so easy to walk away from taking responsibility for our actions, with that principle.

Anyone can get away with anything, using that argument. If everything we do is an expression of Spirit – good, bad, ugly, beautiful, etc. – in its Mystery and Ways – then we go into the realms of transcendental acceptance.

Which means that everything is OK. And I mean everything.

Which, to me, is an expression of moral nihilism (you might call it ´enlightened´to the point where morality doesn´t matter, but same difference).

It´s not an incorrect view of the world, by any means – my contention is that it is incomplete.

I´m one of those facilitators who sees the need for greater standards, guidelines and codes of conduct within the section of spiritual aspirants that seek to guide or facilitate others in a formal capacity.

True, we all facilitate one another. But those of us who do this as a vocation or calling should have a set of standards or guidelines that we adhere to.

I´m not talking about certifications, titles or other accolades – but a general sense of – What is Ethical?

Maybe I´m just not at that transcendental level where I can ignore a breach of ethics in the name of Love, Spirit and Destiny – but I´m okay here for now 🙂

Let me give you some context:

We live in a world where you can become a ´Certified Shaman´ through taking an online course. Where you can call yourself a Soul Retrieval or Akashic Facilitator after 50 hours of going to a seminar. Where articles see fit to give you ´11 Steps to becoming an Expert Yogi this Summer` (I´m not kidding).

Dilution of the core content of these disciplines and paths of initiation/facilitation doesn´t even come close to what´s happening. Rather, it´s a process of distortion.

You then see facilitators, healers and yogis – as per their given certificates – go into the world and offer services that they believe they can provide.

And sometimes it helps people. And sometimes it lands them in the nut house.

(Premature activations of the kundalini by instructors who do not have the skillset to asses the client´s state of mind and energetic requirements come to mind, specifically).

As beautiful as the spiritual journey can be, it is a dangerous path to walk if you don´t know what you´re doing. Some of the long-term effects of facilitations gone wrong can (and do) last for years, if not decades.

I´ve come across quite a few of those cases in the work that I do and in my personal circle of family and friends. When you see the ruin that ungrounded spiritual facilitation can bring to a person and their family, it´s very … hard … (for me at least) to look the other way.

Getting back to the earlier argument:

The transcendental argument of ´All is Well, All is Happening as it Should, All is Love, All is Spirit´ lacks the moral content to say … well… this is shite.

People should be held to account if they´re taking the traditions of an older culture, diluting/distorting it and causing harm (often without intention or the knowledge that they do so).

Then again, I´m not claiming to be a Transcendental Being just yet 😛

But what I do see is the transcendental argument used in defence of a lack of standards in spiritual facilitation. Or worse still, a client-shaming approach, i.e. you should have tuned in and used your discernment. Or, it´s all happening as per your Higher Self´s Will, or, it´s your Soul´s Path, Choice or Karma.

I … am not comfortable with that … not in the slightest. My own work comes with a massive trigger warning label where I explain the potential effects to clients before getting into any work with me. Irrespective of how seasoned, experienced, popular, academically certified they may be (or not). I make them understand that what I do has its effects and consequences, where my (and their) responsibility begins and ends.

I also practice discernment in the clients I take on board because I need to be able to gauge whether a person will be able to handle the intensity of my work. And many cannot. It would cause more harm than good to subject someone to work that is of a deeper intensity than what they should/need exposure to.

This was a lesson I learnt the hard way, with a client who had all the external trappings of being a Teacher: a following, titles, etc. It was a very powerful interaction, but one which showed me the need to lay all this stuff out in total clarity, irrespective of who´s doing the listening. She hated her session and the mirror it held up to her, and of course made it all about me and my alleged lack of professionalism and skill. She and I must have had a powerful contract to work through this together as working with her (and her resistance to be seen) made my biological processes go in overdrive.

It took me a while to recover from that experience and the deep wounds it cut into me. For a long time, I blamed myself (as I tend to) and tried reaching out to her, only to be shamed over and over again. I blamed my body/energy field that took a beating from her resistance and intense force of denial. And I kept wondering what I did wrong and why I reacted to her energy the way I did. If I should stop what I was doing. If I was causing harm. If I was totally deluded, as she claimed I was. If I was not good enough.

The shift came for me when I realized what my mistake was. And to find that I had to look at the situation through the energetic eye, rather than the physical one.

My mistake was not practising that discernment in the beginning. I was too taken by the external trappings at that point of time. Else I´d have known she was not ready for the work I did. Of course when I tried to explain this … it made her go feral. (Yeah, I was a lot more naive then … )

The experience made me a far better facilitator, and one even more confident in what I did – once my ego-mind got past the external trappings (of following, title, labels) – and began to look at her – and me – at the energy level. If I had to look at her chart again today, I´d still have done the same reading of it as I did before.

I now hold a far more specific, focused energetic space than I did before – and readings are getting even deeper than before.

To be fair, at the time, I was walking away from a deeply narcissistic, emotionally abusive woman I had considered my mentor for many years. In retrospect, the clarity of self I achieved through this interaction helped me see that situation very, very clearly. And to eventually break myself away from it.

But the only reason why I reflected and learnt so deeply from this experience was because I took it seriously – and did not wave it off as ´her fault / client shaming´ or as ´the way of the Mystery´ *woo woo, cue mystical sound effects / X-Files theme song*.

I looked at it as a real human interaction and sought to hold myself as accountable as possible. And that is where my growth process came from. And yielded fruit.

So yes – that transcendental perspective of – everything happens for a cause/reason is valid. But it only has meaning when we look for one through a framework that brings it back to the Earth-Plane.

And that … dynamic tension is what, I believe, each and every facilitator who walks this world (and many others) would benefit from engaging with – if they do not do so already.

Tip: Work with Sodalite – it´ll help you discern your clients´ (and your own) energies before going into sessions


Priestess Bairavee Balasubramaniam PhD
The Sky Priestess

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Image: Sodalite peg.jpg by Tillman at English Wikipedia (Transferred from en.wikipedia to Commons.) [CC BY 2.0 (], via Wikimedia Commons

Post © Bairavee Balasubramaniam, 2016. All rights reserved. Please do not use or reproduce without permission. See Terms of Use and Sharing above.


  1. I whole heartedly agree? I went through kundalini at 21 years… No help! It was in my vedic chart I found out 40years later! But I also experienced raj yoga divine love! And magically Raj Yoga teachers came to our little city and I have never looked back….
    But it was a dip into hell and I might never have come back! Which doesn’t bear thinking about!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Thank you again for a great article. I too work with Kundalini energy with clients and although not always possible, I no longer work with NPD, Borderline PD, or even Bi Polar clients (if a diagnosis has been made). What comes up for us as the Unconscious moves into conscious awareness can be terrifying and yet the key to our healing. Unfortunately often those with mental illness or the inability to allow the process to awaken us to healing, is usually surpassed by projection and more !

    I too have learned discernment and intuition are key to choosing those whom we work with.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Indeed Dr. B. The FB, social media is ‘flooded’ with all types of how-to-get-it-on, making Ascension sound like saccharine-sweet easy. I belong to a ASc. forum always maintaining a response as ” this is me sharing my very own experiential process” but noticed an Astrological provider targeting me as LOST & fearful , lost in the illusions to other members. Then ‘selling’ his wares as Wonderful. I replied diplomatically to his commentary as to ‘alert’ other members rather than defend myself. I have since decided I will retire from this forum. The on-going theme of knowing one’s boundaries and discernment is forever challenging us. Do ‘I’, or don’t ‘I’… “letting-go” at times, doesn’t really work altogether. The multi-dimensional self can see many angles, many doors one can enter. I guess we always try to go through the Right Door.

    As it is we can only give ourselves peace, joy & love.

    Namaste x.

    On 25 July 2016 at 18:37, Dr. Bairavee Balasubramaniam wrote:

    > Dr. Bairavee Balasubramaniam PhD posted: ” One of the reasons why I don´t > take the ´Love is Everything, We are all One, it´s Spirit´s Will´ argument > as a default is because it´s so open to abuse. And it´s so easy to walk > away from taking responsibility for our actions, with that principle. Anyo” >

    Liked by 1 person

  4. This is incredibly intelligent and wise, thank you for sharing of your experience. I am just now coming into this wisdom of discernment about clients and learning to spell out the great power and consequences of doing deep soul-level work, so they can make more educated decisions as to whether they are ready and what they will have to face. I am also learning how to say ‘no’ (while healing my own karmic tendencies of letting in to the field just anybody who expresses interest), and that I am not here to serve everyone, and truthfully, not everyone wants or is ready to do what it takes to deeply heal. Thank you so much for affirming this for me, I will be taking all of the steps and advice you have outlined. Blessings in your work, dear sister!


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