Fatal Attractions: Cycles of Pain and the Karmic Choices we Make



You were sacrificed before. Maybe many times.
Your soul got used to it, Maybe you thought it was ´normal´.
You´re trying to do it again.

Short, but an answer that has deep resonance, especially for those who resonate with the archetype of the sacrificial virgin / priestess. Unpack it a little more, and you find your own reasons.

In this context, ´normal´ doesn´t mean good, bad, desirable, healthy, unhealthy, hateable – it just means that you got used to a certain vibration. And internalized it. Perhaps it´s a fixation to break through it, perhaps it´s a conviction that it´s true, or good. Perhaps it´s a need to understand it.

Whatever it is, it´s an attachment to a particular experience. And the soul attracts people, events and opportunities to once again re-live it.

Truly, it´s an argument you can make for any type of karmic lesson that keeps appearing in life. Sometimes it may seem like an unlucky streak ´this always happens to me´ .. i always end up with that kind of person ´, or really, anything that you just find yourself pulled towards without reason or explanation, as though by magic. Sometimes it´s a nice kind of pull, but more often than not – it tends to reflect what we see as our wounds, weaknesses, vulnerabilities.

Karmic attachments are things that exert a powerful pull on our psyches as we seek to understand the why and wherefores behind them. We subconsciously choose these experiences in a bid to gain a more complete experience. Ultimately, to transcend the need to experience it entirely (so the theory says).

These choices we make, which we mystify as ´karma´ , are buried in the subconscious. That doesn´t mean they are beyond our ability to understand and ultimately move past.

It´s time to stop mystifying and romanticizing choices that lead us unto paths of pain as being somehow fated, destined and/or sacred. Or simply things that we cannot change in ourselves.

Whether it´s the past-life trauma of being sacrificed or persecuted, or wounds that surround any kind of recurring lesson surrounding pain – taking a step back to understand why you may be making those choices does help. It stops you from feeling like the Universe hates you, or as though you are some pawn of Fate, moving without your own free will.

For me, at least, that has been one of the deeper realizations of my life thus far. At the day-to-day level, it has helped me to question those things which I felt drawn to, like a moth to a flame – as though I were being drawn into something I could not (ought not) question, or walk away from.

And many of the choices I have made, from taking that moment to detach – from realizing that I had a choice to let this energy into my space, or not – have led to healthier life choices. Ones that have made me feel more fulfilled as a woman and a spiritualist.

There are of course, inexplicably beautiful and powerful moments in which our souls attune to experiences of the Sublime. Those are, for me at least, qualitatively different from the karmic attractions that lead on down repetitive cycles of wounding, grief and a sense of limitation we normally associate with ´spiritual karma´.

I suspect we will see more of the former and less of the latter the moment we realize the power of our own choices in co-creating all that we experience, with whatever it is we consider the Essence of the Sacred.

Bairavee Balasubramaniam
The Sky Priestess

Image Information: Cornelia, the Vestal Virgin, entombed alive surrounded by bones in the dungeon. Line engraving by G. Machetti after B. Pinelli – See page for author [CC BY 4.0 (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0)], via Wikimedia Commons

Post © Bairavee Balasubramaniam, 2016. All rights reserved.

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2016: When Truth and Power Meet The Spirit (Saturn-Neptune squares) & 2016 Astrological Calendar & Preparatory Alignments (Nodes square Galactic Center, Sagittarius New Moon Dec 2015)


Blessings to All. We’ve just come from an intense Sagittarius New Moon (19 Sag, Dec 11, 2015) in which we all discovered, or found the beginnings of, the Path we’re headed on. I had begun a pilgrimage to India with my brother. We visited institutions in which the Sacred Feminine was co-opted by later patriarchal traditions, but never truly represented. We also saw the lack of literature, perspective and space afforded to the Sacred Feminine in the ‘societal mainstream’. And that is a crying shame, coming from the land of ‘a million goddesses’. That being said, the ritualistic treatment of the Goddess as sacred is at times used as a proxy for treating real human women with basic dignity (which really, does not help the latter in they day to day lives – it was a theme that came up in my doctoral research on the Indian Parliament and its inability to hold the debate on the Women’s Reservation Bill. I might write more on that soon.

So yes, my path was lit like a beacon. In different ways, others would have found alignments or ‘pulls’ to their respective paradigms, roads of travel and wider philosophical/intellectual world in which their individual perspectives could be located (if at all). Significant changes in one’s relationship to long-distance travel, academia, institutions of learning, forms of organized religion, philosophical schools and such may also have been highlighted at this time. Many of you may have discovered the need to move past outdated ways of seeing the world that do not honor your own energetic presence and reality. And so the search for a new Path to Truth unfolds.

Watch for the Sagittarius Full Moon (May 21, 2016) to see how these intentions bear fruit in your world/s. Bear in mind that the window of influence for a New/Full Moon tends to be three days before and after the event itself, with longer window periods for Supermoons and Eclipses.

Whilst the Sagittarius New/Full Moon cycles bring us to an expanded (or need to expand) our sense of Truth and Being, we have two other longer-term aspects in the skies that have been continually transforming our relationship with this energy. Saturn (in Sagittarius) squared Neptune (in Pisces) and the North Node (in Virgo) / South Node (in Pisces) squared The Galactic Center (27 Sagittarius).

Saturn in Sagittarius is an energy that asks us to look at the institutions, established channels and authority that tells us how we can and ought to relate to Truth, and what happens when we refuse to comply. It is about that authoritative claim to power that on the one hand inspires us to find the path that connects us to our core-inner sense of strength – and on the other hand – it either asks us to resist institutions (governments, banks, etc.) that seek to deny that process. Those who seek power externally, rather than from within might seek to set themselves up as a new form of ‘authority’. It’s a great time in which Truth and Power are easily conflated. Saturn only leaves Sagittarius on Dec 20/21, 2017 – 2 years down the line. It will not re-enter this sign until 2044.

Saturn in Sagittarius squares Neptune in Pisces throughout 2016. Let’s look at the challenge that Neptune poses:

Neptune represents our deepest connection with the Formless aspect of Spirit which we understand as the mystical, transcendental, deeply intimate and deeply compassionate form of the Sacred. It energies are linked with the infinitely compassionate energies of figures such as The Christ, and Lord Shiva (and many others – most if not all saints, at the very least). In day to day life it reflects upon the way we achieve a sense of Oneness, or are in a state of graceful flow, in synergy with the Cosmos. It is where you find Surrender in that which you call ‘The Sacred’. Truth no longer exists at a single point in Space-Time, nor is it, any longer, an intellectual construct.

Neptune’s energy can also tell us, where, in our lives we are going to need to exercise the greatest levels of compassion, release, and forgiveness. Much of this will relate to our personal spiritual curriculum, or opportunities for growth – and to past, karmic ties. It is also the location in the chart where an individual is most prone to becoming attached to false visions, or, living in an illusory reality or personal fantasy. So, it represents a great many things – and all of these strongly contrast to the fixity, solidity, power and form of Saturn and the passionate, ideational, Truth-Seeking arrow of Sagittarius.

During the Saturn-Neptune squares, you will see this as a continual challenge to find a Path, critique a governing authority, discover a new societal/organizing structure or principle – that aligns better with the compassionate, intuitive, deeply mystical and wholly impermanent nature of Neptune. There isn’t a quick and easy solution to the square, except that we will find our answers through the Titanic friction, or energetic engagement between the two. There are at least two ways this energy can pan out – governments may find themselves becoming more open, more willing to relinquish traditional ideas of security, control and power. Or … they might be go deeper into their own ideology and ethos reflecting the status quo. Institutions of power are resistant to change, as are many individuals. That’s the kind of thing which ultimately leads to a global crisis, economic/political turmoil, and so on – I only hope that that can be averted with more conscious leadership.

We will feel this energetic push-and-pull until September 2016. Bear in mind that Saturn and Neptune will experience their own retrogrades next year, as all Mars (in Sagittarius). Mars’ role will certainly give us the energy to act upon these new visions of Truth and challenge us to find ways to align them with our deeper sense of spirituality. It can also, conversely, fuel the flames of the downward spiral (the other way this can play out).

Key dates (1-3 refers to dates where the square is exact. Dates are given as A/B to reflect time zones – those in Asia/Australia, take the later date):

(1) Nov 26/27, 2015 at 7 Sag-Pis ** EXACT SATURN-NEPTUNE SQUARE **

— March 5/6 Mars shifts into Sagittarius



— March 24/25 Saturn retrograde begins

— April 16/17 Mars’ Retrograde begins

— May 21 Sagittarius Full Moon (watch the seeds set in mid-December 2015 come to fruition)

— May 27/28 Mars re-enters Scorpio (looks familiar, doesn’t it? – that’s what Saturn did in 2015)

— June 12/13 Neptune retrograde begins

(2) Jun 16/17, 2016 at 12 Sag-Pis (both planets in Retrograde, a Grand Mutable Cross forms with these bodies in early June as well) **

— June 29/30 Mars stations direct in Scorpio

— August 2/3 Mars re-enters Sagittarius

— August 12/13 Saturn stations direct


(3) September 10/11, 2016 at 10 Sag-Pis (Saturn is direct, post-retrograde. Bear in mind that Saturn and Neptune are within 3 degrees of one another in their respective signs all throughout July and August 2016) **

— September 16/17 LUNAR ECLIPSE IN PISCES!

— September 26/27 Mars leaves Sagittarius

— Nov 19/20 Neptune stations direct

To sum all of that up, we’re going to be seeing the most intense expressions of this energy between between June-September 2016. Different people, different states, different institutions of governance will respond to these challenges differently.

It is interesting to note that 3 out of 4 eclipses next year will involve the Mutable (Sagittarius, Pisces, Virgo, Gemini) signs. We’ll see many cycles of beginning and ending with respect to the energies discussed in this article.

2016 is going to be a very transformative year, indeed.

But that’s not all 😉

In fact- We’ve already begun to prepare for this shift with the movement of the North Node through Virgo, and its current square with the Galactic Center at 27 Sagittarius. The Galactic Center, as I’ve written about before, is an astrological point that connects us with different Paths of Truth and Guidance. The North Node, on the other hand, asks us to explore a new chapter in our spiritual expression / unfoldment / evolution. At present, the North Node is in Virgo – relating to the themes and archetypes of: The Priestess, spiritual facilitation, earthly/material vessels and paths of service, pragmatism and discernment in spiritual matters, knowing when to draw needed boundaries, health, wellness, etc. The South Node, in Pisces, which relates very much to the Neptunian energy described above (formlessness, compassion, unconditional love, surrender to Spirit) opposes the North Node and squares the Galactic Center as well.

In practical terms, this means that we already facing a deeper spiritual need to find truths that align with us at the most profound level we can experience. We are also searching for physical ways in which we can contain or express this energy in a material, grounded, practical, form. Whilst this powerful, karmic Mutable Nodal T-Square can facilitate the re-birthing of (for instance) the Priestess Traditions linked with the Sacred Feminine, it can equally birth counter-movements to the same. Each of these energies does not have one single expression, but open us to multiple possibilities.

The North/South Node squares the Galactic Center (taking a 3 degree orb of influence) between early October 2015 – the end of January 2016.

You can think about this period as the energetic preparation for the Saturn/Neptune squares (and Mars retrograde in Sagittarius) set to dominate the energies of 2016.

I hope this guide, whilst lengthy, will provide you with your own spiritual-ideational roadmap to the immense energies arising in the year ahead. What an exciting time to be alive!


Dr. Bairavee Balasubramaniam PhD
The Sky Priestess


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Post & Image ‘Gate at Theosophical Society Chennai 11 December 2015’ © Bairavee Balasubramaniam, 2015. All rights reserved – see T&Cs above for conditions of use.

NEPTUNE GOES DIRECT (7 Pisces) – 16:30 UTC, 18-November-2015


As Neptune stations direct, many of us are going to be experiencing a subtle, but powerful shift in the way we access and engage with spiritual energy. Neptune Retrograde was all about casting aside the illusions, ego-based projections and deep insecurities surrounding the act of Spiritual Surrender & Communion with what we understand as ‘The Sacred’. Much of the focus of the retrograde has been on inner experiences and responses to the mystical and transcendental aspects of spirituality. Neptune, in direct form, brings its own intensity, but it also allows us to go forwards and expand outwards, there’s slightly less pressure on the internal experience.

In fact, much of the heaviness and shifting we’re collectively experiencing is tied in with the end of the Neptune Retrograde. If were were to look backwards, check back to major spiritual experiences around February 17-19, 2015 when Neptune was last at 7 Pisces. For reference, the Neptune Retrograde began around June 12, 2015 at 9 Pisces ’49 – Neptune will only pass this degree once more around March 7/8, 2016. Then, and only then, does it leave its shadow period.

Basically, this means that we will be revisiting the spiritual lessons, experiences and opportunities for inner re-alignment and integration that we experienced between Feb-November 2015, over the next few months (till March 2016).

Watch the energy of vision, inspiration, imagination and spiritual communion surge forward as Neptune begins to move in stride, once again 🙂

Much Love,

Bairavee Balasubramaniam
The Sky Priestess

PS – Neptune is the energy of the deep sub-conscious, as it connects with the collective un-conscious. It represents the Cosmic, Primordial Ocean of Energy that connects us all. Not everyone handles Neptune’s energy with ease as it absolutely opens us up to deep vulnerabilities, requiring deep states of spiritual surrender and being able to simply ‘sit with’ powerful emotions and intuitive currents of energy. If you’re feeling vulnerable, seek grounding in nature or the support grounds of friends or people who can hold a nurturing space for you. I’ve also compiled a list of practical techniques that I’ve found of great personal benefit in coping with the shift – http://wp.me/p4OUNS-Gt – Hope it is of use and interest  ❤  ❤  ❤  Blessings!


Image: Cymatium lotorium 2010 G1.jpg – By George Chernilevsky (Own work) [Public domain], via Wikimedia Commons

Post © Bairavee Balasubramaniam, 2015. All rights reserved.

Salt Soaks, Gemstones, Oils & Other Methods of Re-Balancing, Healing or Shifting Dense Energy – A Hands-On Approach

Blessings to all. Many of you who engage with my work tend to be spiritualists, spiritual seekers and facilitators, empaths or highly sensitive people. I wanted to share a few techniques that I’ve been using, which have helped me shift some of the energetic density and deep processing that’s going on.
So in this piece, we’re going to be talking about salt soaks, gemstones, essential oils, herbs, a little homeopathy, guided meditations and visualizations. Use what tools resonate, and always seek guidance before trying something new.
Please bear in mind that none of this advice is meant to replace any medical / counseling / healing work that you do and that it is not a ‘one-size-fits-all’ prescription (see T&Cs below as well).

Salt Soaks

You can create a salt soak either in a bathtub, or using a shallow bucket for your feet. Many of you are already aware of the healing and metaphysically protective qualities ascribed to salt, drawing from various spiritual traditions. We use it to create circles, banish negativity and also balance the electromagnetic field (aura) of the energy body. Salt soaks are also recommended to address swelling / water retention in the feet.
You can create a daily (or bi weekly, or weekly – depends on what feels right for you) ritual with the use of salt, essential oils and herbs. I mix and match depending on what I feel I require at the time. You can immerse yourself in whatever mixtures you choose in the tub (just a little of each herb / salt / oil will do).
Turmeric powder and Neem oil are used for cleansing, healing and protective functions within my own cultural background, and they suit me fine. Bear in mind that Neem oil is fairly strong-smelling and that turmeric can leave stains on the carpet (so use some rags around the bucket/clean tub afterwards). But if you’re doing some clearing of stagnant energy, I’d highly recommend this combination, along with Himalayan pink or black salt.
Some people also use limes or lemons or even apple cider vinegar as part of their soaks (again, not too much is required). These substances assist in detoxification.
You can also support the process by lighting incense (sandalwood, jasmine, rose, lavender, frankincense – each has its own set of properties, and google will help you learn more 🙂 )


Those of your familiar with casting circles, guided meditations / visualizations can also intensify the experience by using mantras or spiritual tools that facilitate energetic re-balancing and healing.
A simple chant that you can use (get creative as you see fit) is simply:
I am Peace.
I am Love.
I am Whole.
I am Healing.
I am in Balance once more.
I am in Balance once more.
I am in Balance once more.
(or words to that effect).
You can also call upon protective guides, angels, animal totems, ancestors (if appropriate) depending upon your spiritual tradition. But as always, do stuff that you feel comfortable doing and check in with an experienced practitioner/facilitator if in doubt.

Essential Oils / Herbs / Homeopathy

You can enhance the experience of the salt-soak using other substances which have been traditionally used to shift, clear, heal and re-balance energy from a metaphysical perspective. Here’s a couple of ideas to get the ball rolling:
Rose oil – high-vibration, essence of Love, 4th / Heart Chakra
Lavender – crown-chakra, calms the nervous system, sedative effects
Neem – highly protective, purifying, acts powerfully on the sacral chakra
Nettle – (thanks to my first mentor for this one) highly protective, dislodges unwanted energies and stagnant fields from the energy body
Patchouli – grounding, Earth-energy, works well with serpent totems
There’s so many oils that help, and various combinations that work beautifully. Just do a little bit of research on what it is you’re wanting to achieve and experiment. Bear in mind that just a few drops will do and that certain oils are not safe for internal consumption.
There’s a also a lot of healing to be found at this time through the use of homeopathic herbs – though I’d highly recommend going to an experienced homeopath if you’re interested. I’ve worked with Ms. Kathy Stranks (www.kathystranks.com ) and am happy to recommend her work to those seeking guidance. One of the herbs she introduced to me whilst I sought her counsel was Lachesis (and that seems to be coming up a lot in the work I’m doing with people now). It is linked powerfully with the archetype of the serpent and works well in unblocking emotions or energies surrounding issues of power, repressed rage/anger and sexuality. I’ve written a little more on this here: http://wp.me/p4OUNS-x0


Gemstones can act as facilitative tools when you do this kind of work, as can guided meditations. Here’s a couple of gemstone suggestions that have been relevant for many at this time:
Rose Quartz – 4th (Heart) chakra, healing issues of self-love, giving and receiving love
Amethyst – 7th (Crown) chakra, clearing the auric field and stagnant energy, especially around the crown/top of the head, ability to receive Cosmic energy / Guidance
Smoky quartz (the real stuff is a deep, dark colour) – fantastic tool for grounding, connecting with Earth energy and releasing stagnant or dense emotions into the Earth
Citrine – 3rd (Solar Plexus) Chakra – good for bringing joy into that energy center and releasing the self from responses that over-identify with the Will of the Ego-Self
Carnelian – 2nd (Sacral) Chakra – great for healing or addressing energetic imbalances with the sacral chakra, including issues surrounding creativity, sensuality, sexual experiences and the ability to authentically embody Joy and the Playfulness of the Inner Child. Other stones that support the same function: Rhodocrosite, Rhodonite, Thulite
Lepidolite – 6th and 7th (Third Eye / Crown) Chakras – excellent for supporting whole-brain function and re-wiring entrenched neural pathways/processes. Of great benefit when you’re trying to take an old situation and look at it through a new lens/paradigm/perspective. I’ve found this to be a useful stone when working through the symptoms of PTSD, and issues surrounding obsessive thoughts or addictions. Works well with amethyst.
Bear in mind that there are thousands of gemstones used for healing purposes, and this is a tiny teensy glimpse into what they can do, and how they can support you at this time. Healing energy through gemstones is an art in itself, it’s important to remember that not all stones (or oils, herbs, or prayers, etc.) work in exactly the same way as they would for another. Again, turn to an experienced practitioner if in need of specific guidance.

Guided Meditations / Visualizations

There are plenty of wonderful meditations that are available free on Youtube. This is one of my favourites. It is a sacred chant from the Hebrew traditions that involves the archangels and their protection, healing and love. I ask my clients to work with this meditation before doing energetic work with them.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jr2lp7cw7CY (this is three minutes long, but here’s a longer version of the same –https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xsdr9St0Z3E )
Here’s a few suggestions for visualization work:
(1) Visualize a reflective bubble of light around you, be it in silver, violet, gold or pink, or even incandescent white. Whatever works.
(2) Set the intention that this bubble is a semipermeable membrane, that it can selectively draw stuff out and let other stuff in. You are inviting the bubble of energy to draw out whatever negativity or imbalance energies within/near you that no longer serve their purpose with you.
(3) At the same time you are inviting cosmic energy, messages from the Divine, from sacred guides and protectors, and from this session to reach you with the most possible loving vibration.
(4) Allow gold/white/etc. celestial light from the cosmos to touch the top of the bubble. And allow deep red/gold/earthy colours (that resonate with Gaia with you) to come from the root of the planet, or its core, up your feet.
(5) Let the energy from the crown stream downwards through your chakras, and the energy of the earth stream upwards. This way there are two currents of energy interacting with the bubble, all in 3D + more.
(6) Once you are done with your meditation, or you feel that the energy has shifted, thank your guides/protectors and whatever herbs/oil/stones/tools that you have used to shift. As far as I’m concerned, all these have their own vibrations (you could call it crystalline consciousness) – saying an energetic equivalent of ‘thank you’ or gratitude goes a long way in developing a more sensitive relationship with different forms of consciousness & their physical expression.
I’d highly recommend using or exploring these techniques as they have really helped me shift through some of the density that I / you / we / me / us are feeling at the individual and collective level. This is especially so for those who spiritually facilitate others in any form, particularly Priestesses who work with the energies of the Womb / Sacral Chakra energy.
Lots of Love and Goddess Bless  ❤
Priestess Bairavee Balasubramaniam PhD
The Sky Priestess ~ www.bairaveebalasubramaniam.com
** Terms and Conditions: Please note that none of the information presented within sessions is meant to replace advice from a medical, healthcare, legal and/or other professional. How you choose to act upon the advice given is entirely based on your own free will. You may use this information for educational and non-commercial reasons, in parts, or in entirety with full credit given to the author and links to her webpage (www.bairaveebalasubramaniam.com ). The author shall not be held liable from any intentional, accidental or other consequences of acting upon, sharing, or engaging with this information in any form. Use of this information implies tacit acceptance of these Terms and Conditions.
© Bairavee Balasubramaniam, 2015. All rights reserved.
Image: Meditation Harmony Peace Crystal.jpg By Cornelia Kopp (Flickr: meditation) [CC BY 2.0 (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.0)], via Wikimedia Commons

FEEDING THE BOTTOMLESS PIT: When Nurturing becomes an invitation to Codependency.

Yakunchikova_Fear (1)
Every single being consciously in search of ‘the spiritual’ has come upon the question of just how to much to give, and whether, if at all, to expect something in return. We dance around this question when we invoke stories of saints who were martyred without expecting anything in turn, and when we declare that we are entitled to some form of energy exchange for our time, work, and presence. There are different answers to this question, and I invite you to find the one that resonates with you.
I have seen, in myself, and in spiritualists whom I utterly and absolutely respect, the tendency to conflate being ‘nurturing’ and ‘of service’, with … absolutely crossing into the BS that is codependency. That is essentially when we devote our energies to the nurture and care of another, whilst neglecting ourselves, in the hope that they will fulfill some deep need or longing within.
I call it BS, in retrospect, because it really does look that way when you realize your own worth – and a moment of clarity arises, asking – what on earth did I think I was doing? But for those caught in the energy sink that is codependency, it’s a painful process and one that constantly challenges the depths of our self worth, and whether we truly believe we will find the nurture that we are entitled to. I take a lot of inspiration from Robin Norwood’s Women who Love too Much – a book that has saved my life, and the lives of countless men and women who have been unable to distinguish healthy forms of nurture with nurture that ultimately feeds the fears (of the self-and-other), perpetuating a very damaging process.
In spiritual discourse, we are called to practice compassion and forgiveness and that is absolutely legitimate, valid and necessary. However, we forget to begin with ourselves. As some of us drain ourselves to fit to certain ideals of service, we end up running on empty. Resentment fills the void as does the question of ‘I’m doing so much, but why, oh why, is _______ not taking caring of me in turn? You could fill that blank with ‘The Divine’, ‘The Universe’, ‘God or Goddess’, ‘your partner’s name’, and so on.
When you’ve reached that point, where you have given just as much as you can give – you have a choice of breaking away from the cycle (which is tough for many, but hard work over time pays off), or of getting even deeper into it – meaning that you’ll force yourself into some kind of energetic crisis that will force you to shift into a healthier vibration. Some people get it right the first time, and others take many years to get there – that just depends on the baggage you’re carrying and whether you’ve done the ‘inner work’ in preparation of the shift.
I stress ‘inner’ because there is only so far your conscious mind can adhere to mantras of self-nurture, self-love and empowerment without requiring a deeper shift in your sub-conscious to make a lasting change. Mantras, facilitations, gemstones, NLP and other tools can help – but, as I have found – it takes a powerful amount of internal change for such changes to actually manifest in all aspects of your lives.
This has been a post I’ve been wanting to write for several years now and it seems particularly relevant with the astrology of Vesta in Pisces opposed the North Node in Virgo, tying into much of the Spiritual Shifts that many are experiencing now. I hope you find it relevant on your journey, and as always – stick with it if it resonates, let it go if it doesn’t. Your awakening will happen on the timeline, in the way you have chosen to let it.
Two friends of mine essentially ended up asking me the same question not too long ago, namely: How do I know when I’ve given enough, or when I’m already giving too much? (And yes, Nurture and energy is something that comes from Infinite Spirit, true, but you’re still in charge of the vessel that channels it…)
I immediately replied, “when what you give feeds fear and insecurity”. That can apply to you, or the person you’re giving your energy to, or both.
It’s a simple metric, and obviously a general principle that needs a nuanced application of itself – that comes with time, experience and the habit of self-love. But I find it a powerful question to pose to the Self, to the most powerful relationships in a person’s life, and even to the relationship between the facilitator and the facilitated.
If you find that your best efforts to making someone feel safe, loved, or wanted are simply reinforcing those fears – perhaps it’s time to step back a little, rethink and regroup. Rather than seeing this as a ‘selfish’ act, perhaps it’s better to think of it as ‘self-centered’, which is fine. Are we not parts of the Universe experiencing consciousness? Is our frame of mind, health, well-being and sanity, any less than another’s?
Key questions to ask, and answer. In some cases, you will find that an open-hearted discussion can truly smooth the way for a better partnership, and in others, you will find that walking away will free you-and-whoever-you’re-dealing-with from a damaging, vicious cycle of energetic loss and imbalance.
This is something that just about everyone in the world has faced as part of their journey of spiritual evolution. It’s not a sign that you’re terribly broken, or a victim of your thoughts – it simply means that you too, are human, as are the people with whom you learn these lessons.
It’s okay to walk away, be there, do whatever you feel is right – but at the end of the day, as best you can … it’s probably a good idea to be as kind and articulate about it as possible. Whether the other person gets you is – essentially – their deal, not yours.
Keep questioning people, ideas and things that make you feel bad about not giving up your needs for another. And the more you challenge this stereotype, the more you will discover a healthier form of self-nurture evolving alongside compassion for others.
You might ask how all the Ascended Beings we look up to practice such extreme levels of compassion without being selfish (a common term that the ego-mind uses to downplay the need for self-care). What I found is that their mastery of self-love was a prerequisite to their compassion for others. These Masters could withstand anything and everything the external world threw at them precisely because no one and nothing could shake their core of self-love. When you reach THAT point, you’re in a whole different league, my friends.
At least that’s my take on it – puts a very different spin to things, doesn’t it?
Priestess B. Bairavee ( www.bairaveebalasubramaniam.com )
The Sky Priestess
Image: Fear, by Maria Yakunchikova Русский: Мария Якунчикова ([1]) [Public domain], via Wikimedia Commons
Post © Bairavee Balasubramaniam, 2015. All rights reserved.
** Please note that none of the information presented here is meant to replace advice from a medical, healthcare, legal and/or other professional. How you choose to act upon the advice given is entirely based on your own free will. By engaging with this work, you also accept the author’s non-liability for any consequences that may emerge from reading this work. You also accept that any part of this work can be used for non-commercial purposes with proper citation to the author and her websitewww.bairaveebalasubramaniam.com, T&Cs apply.



Spiritual evolution is a tough thing to measure, however, there are certain markers which indicate that a ‘shift’ has happened. If you’re still in the middle of a particular phase, the inverse might apply (especially if you’re at the cusp of a spiritual breakthrough). Bear in mind that the process is never-ending, it just completes one chapter and starts anew, like an ascending/descending spiral.

The build-up to a shift often entails the breaking down of all you thought you knew, all you thought you were. It is, generally speaking, not an easy process.

Once a shift has happened, your paradigm is re-set. Sensitivity tends to increase, as does the capability to withstand all that it entails.

You are better able to perceive spiritual energies / to understand the psychological nature of your attachments and responses to the world.

You are likely to re-interpret key aspects of your spirituality in new ways. You might realize that something you thought was no longer a part of you, still is. Or you might realize something you identify with now simply does not resonate. You might be drawn to a paradigm you had dismissed before, or move away from something you’d been following from a while. Possibilities are endless.

You will begin to notice things you had taken for granted before, or things previously invisible to your method of discernment. At the same time, your ability to discern will (most likely) lead to a lessening of ego-based judgment. In short, you can see things better for what they are, but this does not affect you as much as it did before.

Your relationship with the earth deepens, as does your need for periodical grounding.

You are less able to accept vague generalizations about a ‘better, higher’ spirituality and begin to question ‘accepted wisdom’.

Rather than renouncing that-which-makes-you-human and the energetic network that links you to this physical plane (and others), you deepen your sense of shared humanity & embodied sentience.

The constructs of Up/Down, Male/Female, Lower/Upper, Light/Dark realms ceases to have the power of sanction and division. They are, all, equally sacred and part of an indivisible whole.

As you continue to evolve, it is important to seek out others who can help you in the process. No one has the answers to everything. It’s within the Self, yes, and the Self is a part of the Universe seeking to figure itself out, yes … but if we could access that knowledge, we wouldn’t quite be on the path we’re on…

You will find the need to constantly check in with the spiritualists/counselors you work with to ensure they have made the necessary shifts in themselves, so that they can then better work with with you. (That’s one of the reasons why the guru/mentor paradigm is a little hard to work with in this timeline – everyone keeps shifting so fast! )

The people who are drawn to your work will be different. Their needs will reflect the vibration that you now embody. If you’re seeing a pattern in your clients / recipients of your services, pick up the message the Universe is sending you.

Whilst your own growth will be a source of joy for you, you will constantly be amazed at how quickly young children seem to accelerate their own wisdom. It is a powerful reminder to remain humble and to realize that there is always something to learn.

Priestess B. Bairavee
The Sky Priestess

Image: Multiple cloud-to-cloud and cloud-to-ground lightning strokes – NOAA.jpg, National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration, public domain via Wikimedia Commons.

Post © Bairavee Balasubramaniam, 2015. All rights reserved.

** Please note that none of the information presented here is meant to replace advice from a medical, healthcare, legal and/or other professional. How you choose to act upon the advice given is entirely based on your own free will. By engaging with this work, you also accept the author’s non-liability for any consequences that may emerge from reading this work. You also accept that any part of this work can be used for non-commercial purposes with proper citation to the author and her website www.bairaveebalasubramaniam.com, T&Cs apply.

Taurus Full Moon, 27 October 2015 (3 Taurus, 12:05 UTC).


Blessings! I’m going to keep this short and sweet as the Taurus Full Moon brings out the philosopher in me yearning to write a book on the various attempts at bridging the spiritual with the material. In a nutshell, that is the key theme of this Lunation: How do we, as Beings of Energy-with-Consciousness, relate to the experience of Physical, Material, Embodiment?

In less jargon-laden language, basically, this Full Moon asks us to understand what grounds us, how, and why. All of us look to certain material relationships, people, experiences, memories and sensations that permit us – at a deep level – to not only occupy physical space, but even to enjoy that process. It can be the memory of a nurturing mother, a lover that let you feel loved even when you felt very unloveable, the smell of a meal that makes you think of the grandmum who held you when you were little – or anything of that ilk.

If it’s not a memory, then perhaps it is the belief or aspiration to find something that will ground you, hold space for you, and allow you to simply experience this physical world – and Be.

Scorpio’s role in this configuration asks you to look at the roots of the anchor(er). It wants to the know the source of this strength and to question – whether it is an appropriate attachment – whether this energy is freely given – and how, if you want to, you can find the same strength within yourself without having to find your rootedness in another person, experience, or thing.

Scorpio doesn’t lay low on the tough questions. It’ll knock you straight in the face if you’re playing the denial game. Taurus has it’s own way of delivering a swift kick to the behind when absolutely required.

But where the question of who/what grounds you, and why? is answered in a way that resonates with your sense of integrity and,your capacity for joy, magic happens.

Taurus brings the soft vibrations of sensual joy, playfulness, and a relatively care-free approach to enjoying this material life. It doesn’t mean you have to be a glutton, or nymphomaniac. It simply means that you can take pleasure in the very, very, physical process of ‘being alive’. Even the act of breathing can turn into a very sensual, pleasurable process when you know how 🙂

Scorpio’s energy, on the other hand, leads to the waters of deep regeneration, alchemy and the inner reserves of power. It’s a lot more intense, but when balanced, can lead us to a Rebirth of the Self. This is not to say that all of our wounds magically disappear, it is to say that we may find ourselves re-cognizing the powerful, beautiful, authentic Being-in-Flesh-with-Emotion that we are. The role of a shaman, intimate and/or sexual partner is strongly highlighted here – if you’re working with another person through whatever process that comes up for you.

Looking to the asteroids – again – keeping a long story short, it seems to be a time in which we look back to the Shadow/Underworld and re-connect with allies we thought we had lost, and sources of nurture we thought we had forgotten.

It’s quite a profound energy to work with at this time, and I wish you all the very best in doing so. How this energy moves through/as you/with you depends entirely upon how you choose to let it.

Some of you will need to shed tears, others will seek out holy places (with Neptune Retrograde at 7 Pisces trining the Sun and sextiling the Moon). Some of you will turn to healers, others will face the inner self in isolation. Some of you will do one of these, all of these, or none at all. It’s really your path and your individual pattern of spiritual growth that will determine the road you choose to take at this time.

Bear in mind that we are all strongly influenced by the opposition between Jupiter-Venus-Mars at 15-17-20 Virgo and Chiron Retrograde at 17 Pisces. In more ways than one, it is truly a time for us to balance our spiritual lives with our material ones, hopefully seeing that one cannot exist without the other as long as we remain in human form.

Blessings to All ❤ 🙂

Bairavee Balasubramaniam

The Sky Priestess


PS – Kudos to my epic brother Ashoka Mohannan for teaching me stuff as part of our ongoing pilgrimage in Nepal. Today, we went to a very sacred place that had water from Himalayas running through as part of an underground stream. We also found a hidden pool of water devoted to the Goddess Parvati, tucked away behind an ancient shrine to Lord Pashupathinath (Shiva). This was a location that was revealed to me purely through spiritual means in February 2014 and is still relatively unknown to most Nepali people (there’s a signboard and all, but it’s not written about anywhere). It is a very sacred place to me and I am glad to have had my brother there at a key moment of re-birth for myself. ❤

1st Image: Lele Temple rearview by Ashoka Mohannan, 2015
2nd Image: Me and my Brother by Gautam, 2015. 
Post © Bairavee Balasubramaniam, 2015. All rights reserved.



In early November 2014, we began a journey that transformed the way we – as individuals and as a collective – understood the energies of The Goddess and the Divine Feminine.

Since then, over the past 11 months, we have (almost continuously) had a series of Grand Fire Trines in the sky, involving bodies like Uranus, The Goddess Asteroids (Pallas Athena, Juno, Vesta, Ceres), Jupiter in Leo, Saturn in Sagittarius (pre-Retrograde), Mercury, The Sun and so on. The energies of the Fire Signs were perpetually lit by bodies connected with different facets or aspects of the Divine Feminine.

In the next few hours, that 11-month long focus comes to an end, as the Moon transits out of Leo and ends its trine with Uranus in Aries and Pallas Athena in Sagittarius.

When I first noticed this near-constant cosmic beacon of fire lit in the sky in 2014, I saw it as the birth of a new beginning. At the time, so many of us were only just waking up from the upheaval of the Grand Cardinal Cross of 2014, peaking in intensity during April/May 2014. As far as I am aware, the last time we had anything that intense, in fact, for a far shorter period of time, was during The Great Depression and the rise of Nazi Germany (the 1930s).

In that context, the Great Goddess Fire Trine, to me, seemed like a Goddess-send. It fueled us all with a sense of – if not optimism – then at least the sheer will to push through, push forward and explore the Birthing of a New Self, from the Ashes of the Old. Much of that theme continued through with the Saturn-in-Scorpio retrograde and transit that concluded not too long ago (September 17/18, 2015).

Whilst there are some exceptions, mostly by way of the Moon’s Transit through Leo, aspecting a (later) trine between Uranus in Aries and Saturn in Sagittarius, I haven’t seen any further Grand Fire Trines for the next 2-year period.

It spells the end of a chapter of growth and intense energetic acceleration, but right on its heels we see the next chapter beginning – with the North Node’s upcoming transit through Virgo (October 10, 2015 – April 19, 2017).

Here’s where all of those powerful realizations, awakenings and energetic upgrades within the different layers of the Self are asked to ‘get real’ in a different kind of way. Whilst remaining authentic to Self, the challenge is more so about learning how to manifest an Earthly Path of Service as a Facilitator/Priest or Priestess honoring the Feminine (and ideally the Masculine as well). It’s about learning how to Serve with Humility, knowing that the work you do in 3-D reality is just as important as ascending to different states of Being. I take inspiration from the Bodhisattvas, beings who had attained such states of realization but who chose to return to be of Loving Service.

In practical terms, we’re going to be seeing a renewed focus on: daily rituals, habits, routines, health/healing practices, re-discovering the the sanctity of the Womb & the Priestess Traditions, and so on. We’re going to collectively learn the need for earthly boundaries whilst we work with the vibration of unconditional, boundless compassion, represented by the South Node in Pisces. We’re going to learn how to honor the material requirements of being a Vessel that channels spiritual energy or performs spiritual services, and much, much, more.

It’s a very rich vein of growth for spiritual seekers and facilitators, irrespective of the paths, labels or belief systems they identify with. What I’m most excited about is the fact that we’re also going to be focusing on Discernment, or the need to differentiate between different types of spiritual energies, vibrations and experiences without falling into the trap of ego-based judgment. It is one thing to reject something because you have been conditioned to dislike or fear it, and it is another to move away from something that simply does not resonate with you. Similar dynamics on the surface, but vibrationally distinct from one another.

Such is the Journey Ahead.

Happy Beginnings, Everyone!

Bairavee Balasubramaniam

The Sky Priestess

Original article on The Great Goddess Fire Trine: http://wp.me/p4OUNS-bb

Image ‘Muthu Mariamman Temple, Ambattur – 2015 – colour enhanced’ & Post © Bairavee Balasubramaniam, 2015. All Rights Reserved.

RE-DEFINING RELATIONSHIPS: North Node/Juno/Super-Galactic Center Conjunction (0-1 Libra) sextiles Saturn (0 Sagittarius)

Close up
Close up
Libra’s energy is one that asks us to take a step back and be objective in our dealings with others. It asks us to create a space in which we can co-exist with others without the need to make them bend to our will, or bend over to theirs. It’s one of the most powerful signs in the zodiac – as I see it – because it is the only sign that does not need to transform another in some way. Libra is also associated with a sense of justice, though, I doubt that it refers to a sense of ‘tit-for-tat’, but rather a deeper sense of how all things work together as equally sacred expressions of Source Energy – woven together into far more complex puzzle of being.
The North Node represents the direction in which the Soul is urged to grow further into as part of its Journey of Evolution. Juno, to me, represents the energy of the Divine Feminine and its ability open or awaken the soul, particularly through the ‘soul-mate’. This isn’t always a happy experience, but certainly a powerful one. The Super-Galactic Center represents, in astrology, the most potent connection we have to Source at this time and it exerts a fairly mysterious ‘pull’ towards certain people, relationships or ideas that lead to deeper understandings of Balance. All of this is occurring between 0-1 Libra (not forgetting Black Moon Lilith at 2 Libra).
So what do all these conjunctions in Libra challenge us to understand, or become?
Now’s a time in which we are asked to expand our definition of ‘partnership’, ‘collaboration’ and ‘balanced integration’. Whether it’s a marriage, or joint project between two parties, it’s a time in which we re-evaluate our role in relationships.
Are in in them for the right reasons? Are we with the right person/people? Are we (ourselves) the ‘right’ person? It really takes two to tango, and what we see mirrored in others, at some level, reflects some aspect of ourselves. And sometimes, rather than the other person changing – if you feel for the relationship enough – it might be you who has to change. Only you can decide if that’s right for you, or if you’ve done that for far too long already.
Whilst the North Node-Juno conjunction it itself represents a powerful opportunity for growth in these areas of life, particularly with those we share soul-contracts with – it’s is especially significant as both these bodies conjunct the Super-Galactic Center at 0 Libra, whilst sextiling Saturn at 0 Sagittarius. So the choices we make now resonate stronger with the ways in which we connect with Spirit/Source/Center and they lay the foundation for a far longer-term commitment to explore/transform certain outlooks on life (belief systems, ideas, philosophies, etc.), potentially through foreign travel as well..
Those with placements near 0 Taurus will experience this as an absolutely powerful Yod or Finger of Fate, propelling you to a certain set of karmic crossroads in which you have to choose. Choose with path you take, what you choose to hold onto, where your attachments and values lie (or don’t). You’ll be asked to let go of values that no longer resonate with the wisdom coming through from this powerful conjunction, despite how comfortable or familiar they may seem. What comes next, however, will be a powerful new beginning in the way you relate to yourselves and significant others. 
Some relationships will become stronger at this time, and others will begin to fray. We’ll see much more of this during the upcoming Lunar Eclipse in Aries, with the Sun in Libra opposed the Moon in Aries – in about a week’s time! Hang onto your hats 🙂 

The Final Lessons of Saturn-in-Scorpio … Preparing for Rebirth


Saturn has one day left before it leaves Scorpio (till 2041) – and so many are already feeling the powerful, intense, currents and ripples of change it brings in its wake. We’re headed for the mountaintop (Sagittarius) next, but first we’ve got to complete the work down below – in the Underworld, the Sub-Conscious, the place we Descended into and found ourselves stripped and laid bare of our illusions, fears, insecurities and inauthenticity. We’ve already taken the steps towards the entrance of the cave, leaving behind the teachers of the realms beneath.

So many now are in their metaphysical death throes before re-birthing into a new cycle of being, a new level of awareness – whilst others are sailing smoothly under the pressure of such immense energy.

Many of you know what you’re feeling, enduring, living through or even soaring through (depending on your individual journey) – and what you’re at the cusp of emerging into. But the question is –

What do you with all this intense energy? What lessons do the final days of Saturn-in-Scorpio ask us to complete and embody?

For starters –

Honor your Commitments. Ensure fair dealings or exchanges.
Finish off things that you’d been putting off.
Be honest in your dealings.
Be charitable, if you are able.
Believe that you have the strength within to rise to the challenge.
Be authentic. Never compromise on your core values.
If your core values no longer resonate, change your core values.
Be truthful. Represent yourself with honesty and integrity.
Cut away, or simply walk away from anything that no longer resonates.
You owe no one and no thing an explanation.

But above all,

Remember your power and use it well.

Many have asked me ‘when does the process end’. And in all truth, growth never does. We simply experience new phases of it.

We’re going to see several major cosmic/astrological alignments in the coming weeks, through which time a new ‘normal’ will begin to assert itself in your realities. We began the process long ago, powered by the generation-transforming Uranus-Pluto squares, peaking with the Grand Cardinal Cross in mid-2014 and the Saturn-in-Scorpio transit (itself in mutual reception with Pluto-in-Capricorn) between 2012-2015.

So there really isn’t any going back, in terms of the levels of consciousness or the doors of awakening we’re about to step into.

For those looking for more specific, human-timeframe-dates, here’s a couple of key markers (earlier dates for the US/South America, later dates for Asia/Australia):

Mercury Retrograde Begins, Jupiter/Neptune opposition, Juno enters Libra – Sept 16/17

Saturn’s actual shift in Sagittarius – Sept 17/18  Exact time: 02:46:04 hours:minutes:seconds on September 18, 2015  in UTC

Lunar Eclipse in Aries – Sept 27/28
Mercury Retrograde ends – October 8/9
North Node’s shift into Virgo, leaving Libra – Oct 9/10

These will be fairly intense times that will speed up the process of death-to-rebirth. I suspect more people will be settling into the ‘new normal’ towards in the final week of October 2015, as Mercury exits its shadow phase.

Astrologically speaking, there are few periods of human history in the past few decades that – as far as I know of – have been anywhere near as intense as what we’ve been going through for the past three years.

So please – Be gentle on yourselves, those of you who are still letting go of whatever that no longer serves you. It could be your desires, attachments, fears, shadows, intimate partnerships, finances – whatever your personal journey of awakening has entailed.

It’s been a rough, rough, transit for so many….

Some of you will sleep loads, others will be buzzing like Duracell bunnies – don’t bother with comparisons, simply honor the time you have now – alive, awake and at the precipice of eventful transformation.

You’ll have the time you need to grieve what has been released. Practice gratitude for the lessons you’ve learnt and prepare to set sail for new horizons …

Can you feel the breeze yet?
The whiff of fresh air that so many parts of you have yearned for?
Can you feel the rays of the Light on your face?

It’s right around the corner.

Finally, a new Chapter – about to begin.

Love, Blessings and Honor to All,

Bairavee Balasubramaniam

The Sky Priestess

Image: Dragon Storm.jpg – From http://solarsystem.nasa.gov/multimedia/display.cfm?IM_ID=3763 ; NASA/JPL/Space Science Institute- public domain, via Wikimedia Commons.

Post © Bairavee Balasubramaniam, 2015.www.bairaveebalasubramaniam.com